The kids of today have an apt for being handed things. An iPhone in third grade, five cookies before bed instead of two, a trophy even with nothing won.
Growing up in a time where everything is catered towards them can make parents afraid of the word “no.” A negative word, sure, but also one of firm importance. This in turn is sparking an entitled upcoming generation, or few, where what they want is what is given with no remorse for the burden to earn.
Participation trophies are just part of this growing problem. Kids participate in sports starting at a young age whether it be soccer, tee-ball, or basketball.
So far, so good. Sports are meant to teach children teamwork, goal setting, hard work and how to win or lose with grace. But when trophies are given out to everyone involved in the sport, whether or not they resulted victorious, they are deprived from those crucial values which may come in handy more readily in the future. As one can imagine, sports now serves a vital role in this fairly new game of tug-of-war.
USA Today reports how James Harrison, a linebacker for the Pittsburgh Steelers, sounded off on Instagram about his two sons receiving participation trophies and shared his stance on the matter.
Harrison wrote, “… I’m sorry I’m not sorry for believing that everything in life should be earned and I’m not about to raise two boys to be men by making them believe that they are entitled to something just because they tried their best…”
Not everyone in life is a winner or will be the top dog. Giving children participation trophies is telling them that they are all winners which is about as far from reality as you can get in a culture that has a narrow rubric of constituting success.
Professional athletes would not get paid as much as they do if there were no winners or losers. Large firm executives would not not be part of large firms to begin with if not for certain qualifications they exercised over others. Feeding the distorted view of equality in performance amongst children is pretentious just as much as it is dangerous.
Sports should be a fun experience for children, but its obligation is multi-faceted in developing winners and improvisers who can adapt to change or stress, including failure. Of course, getting a trophy at the end can supposedly be an incentive to continue playing, which, if being honest, is the true goal of the beginners sports leagues for a higher return rate. Too bad drawing that line is up for debate as well.
Perhaps for children 6-years-old and younger it flies, because neither they nor their parents acknowledge the signifance of competition, or the two sides of its coin. Any age older is too old to keep feeding them the lie.
Unfortunately, all parents believe their child is special and that they deserve the world because of it. While true in a collectivist fashion, parents should not shield their kids from failure. It will do them more damage than the word “no,” that’s for sure.
Jessica Lahey, author of “The Gift of Failure: How the Best Parents Learn to Let Go So Their Children Can Succeed” said: “Kids learn from seeing efforts fail, reassessing their strategy—maybe even throwing the strategy out the window altogether and coming up with an entirely new one—and trying again to see how that new strategy works.”
Learning to fail is an important skill to have once the sunshine and rainbows run out. When that time comes, often it is forgotten that failure can be extremely motivating as well, making success that much sweeter.
Children are growing up entitled and lazy because they believe they have to do the bare minimum to achieve success. They no longer understand the phrase “hard work pays off” and we have our own society to blame for that.
So when the inevitable does come and the new generations of kids grow up and join the workforce, they are in for a rude awakening. What’s worse, we will have to hear about it . . . again.